Saturday, September 20, 2014

Back to normal farting.

Well, and normal eating too I suppose.

See,  when you’re doing a certain kind of “prep”,  you’d best not stray too far from the facilities.  Plus,  don’t even think of letting off any kind of pressure.  Perceived or otherwise.

You’ll be sorry.

You may recall that I had a little visit back in the spring with a particular Doc who quite often gets behind in his work?  But tries to “rectify” the situation?   

I got a million of them.

The thing is,  after that little visit,  it was determined that muggins here had to present himself at the Oakville Trafalgar Hospital outpatient cattle call/waiting room,  all prepped and ready for yet another anal probe.

Fun times,  let me tell ya.

Actually,  the event itself is kind of a non event really,  since the whole prep business is just about one of the worst tortures known to man. 

Forget water boarding. 

Just starve a guy,  and then make him take a couple tablets of Dulcolax,  followed immediately by a special glass of something called Pico-salax.

It’s exothermic!   Oh ya.  Gotta wait till it cools down.  Although,  I mixed it with cold water to start with.  What a witches brew that sh*t is!   Wowsers.

Then watch what happens!  There’s usually two or three “courtesy flushes” if you know what’s good for you.

Ever been to Niagara Falls? 

Try to imagine it coming out yer….well,  never mind.



Anyway,  it’s all good.  Nothing was malignant or anything.  I think they like to have you in the hospital in case things go a little south?  It was fine.  Five polyps!  Seriously?   A couple of them were a little on the large size too.  I watched most of it,  but must have missed a few bits,  since I was surprised at the final count. 

They give good drugs.  Of course,  that meant no alcomohol for a couple days,  but hey!  I lost five pounds!

Travelling Companion had to chauffeur me home.


So I was kinda going a little nuts today trying to catch up on a couple things.  Managed to pull a muscle. 

In my ass.

Don’t you hate when that happens??

It’s one of the ones you need to keep you from falling over,  so literally a pain in the butt.



I did manage to put a couple coats of finish on some trim that I’ll be installing up at sister-in-law’s place.  Spent the rest of the time up on the roof.  Looks like we’ll be tearing down the chimney and rebuilding it before the roofers come. 

When I say “we”,  I don’t include me in that equation.  Too big a job for one guy,  so I have someone coming first thing Monday morning with his crew to get at it.  It’s gonna be a bit nuts around here,  since the roofing company said they’d likely be showing up on Monday as well.



My bad.  I’ve neglected to get this sorted out,  and now I’m under the gun.  Has to be done in the name of marital tranquility,  shall we say?


That’s all I got.   Wish me luck.   Enjoy the rest of your weekend,  and thanks for stopping by.


  1. Count your self as lucky.. they found so many polyps in me that I had to do the whole prep thing again for the next round where they went in and removed 15 cm of my colon... That took months to get over,,, And gave me a zipper up the front...

    1. Yup. I figure I pretty much dodged a bullet....

  2. Sounds like not a very fun procedure, glad is was you and hope does not happen to me.

  3. Worst prep for anything in my entire life, but the nap during the proceedure was the best! ;c)

  4. I could make all kinds of jokes but truth is... more folks should get this done. Bill's dad died of colon cancer and he should have lived many more years. Shitty story... yeah.... but it's better in the end (yeah, that was intended)....

  5. Because of you I'll never look at Niagara Falls in the same way.

  6. Serious stuff, but presentation was pretty funny:)

  7. Your one liners are my kind of humor! I agree with some above comments, funny way to discuss a procedure that can and does save lives - get her done, folks! My 6 siblings and I all must do so every 5 years as our father had colon cancer and all of us have had polyps removed -- much better than the alternative. Stay funny, my friend! (sorry Dos Equos commercial)


Well, I've been getting too many spam comments showing up. Just a drag, so we'll go another route and hope that helps. So, we won't be hearing anything more from Mr. Nony Moose.
I guess I'll just have to do without that Gucci purse.