Thursday, July 15, 2010

Kind of like Puerto Rico.

Only without the pool.

I'd like to start off talking a bit about the human condition and,  by "human",  of course that would mean me.  Maybe that might be a bit of a stretch for some.  But just go with it.
Of course I'm referring to a certain zone of temperatures that we would just as soon avoid.  Freezing cold.  Insufferably hot. 
I'm sure I could go on about pre-historic man going out and bonking some poor critter over the head just to take its hide in order to keep warm in the winter,  that kind of thing,  but you know what I mean.
We've evolved into wussies.

Well,  I know I sure have.

So you're wondering where the heck I'm going with this?

There was the possibility of dining in one of Vienna's "finer" restaurants tonight,  since my travelling companion felt that some out of town visitors should be treated to a serving of boiled meat.
You think I'm making this up.  No no....this place has a speciality,  and it's some sort of boiled meat.   Quite good apparently.

Use your imagination.

I should warn you BEFORE you click on that link (it's "Plachutta",  by the way)  just be sure and turn down your speakers,  unless you want to hear some Strauss waltz played over and over.  It'll go away if you go to the link with the British flag.

If you wish,  you're certainly welcome to read some of the reviews on Tripadvisor,  since there are over 90 at this point.  I don't have one there.  I haven't been there yet.

Tonight will not be one of the nights when I'll be going out for boiled meat,  thank-you, since this place that some have raved about (and where Putin had a meal not long ago,  as you may recall)  does NOT have air conditioning!

I'm not kidding.

Now,  judging by some of the reviews,  and the average price of their entrees,  there seems to be something not quite right there.  Are they just too cheap?
I mean,  it's not like I'm going to show up in my shorts and sandals. This place is apparently somewhat posh, so my sense of propriety tells me that, I'll need to wear dress pants and....ulp,   SHOES!


See,  I was quite willing to go to the Arcotel where,  even thought the food isn't the best,  at least there's air conditioning.
I was overruled.

Now do you see where I was going with that whole "human condition" thing? 
I'll be staying home.
I would actually rather go without dinner,  than sit there and sweat like a pig.


As a matter of fact,  there are darned few places in town that are air conditioned.  Not sure what the rationale is.  Either they are too cheap,  are not prepared,  or are in denial.
The only place that I have to go to on a regular basis that is nicely air-conditioned is the Billa down the street.  They seem to have some sense.  So much easier to pick out your groceries without the sweat dripping off your nose.....onto the produce,  I might add!

OK.  Mental image.  Be extra sure and wash all produce.

So just for fun,  I thought I'd let you take a look at a couple of the pages from one of the local free newspapers that I pick up from time to time.
Seems we are in fact having a heat wave.

 "Heat paralyses Vienna"

OK,  I'm not translating all three pages,  just look at the pictures.
 Suffice to say,  a fair amount of chaos.  (computers exploding, etc.)

So,  you know how in the dead of winter,  when there hasn't been all that much snow,  and then suddenly there's like,  snow up to your waist?   You've been meaning to replace that raggedy assed old snow shovel you've been using for years?  So you make it to the local hardware store only to discover that there are no snow shovels to be had for love nor money?
Well,  on that last page there,  they're explaining how flip-flops,  bikinis and sunglasses are all sold out.  Huh? 
Mind you,  I was just out earlier this afternoon and a lot of the young chicks were wearing flip flops.  Nobody was going with the bikini program though.   Dammit.

So,  is there some flip-flop company we should be investing in? I can't seem to find anything on the stock exchange.

Or should we just bring in a few trailer loads of air conditioners?


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Well, I've been getting too many spam comments showing up. Just a drag, so we'll go another route and hope that helps. So, we won't be hearing anything more from Mr. Nony Moose.
I guess I'll just have to do without that Gucci purse.