I couldn’t “Do the News”.

Because I’d start to laugh.  I’m sorry.  There’s some sh*t out there that almost makes me poop my pants.

Have you seen this one?

 

Leader of Amish breakaway group guilty of hate crime in hair attacks

“Heretics”?   Oh wait no,  “hair attacks”.  OK,  I’m good so far.  But then I start reading.

You can click on the link if you choose, and TRY and read the rest of the article.   I couldn’t seem to do it,  as I was having some difficulty with my concentration.  And well,  the tears from laughter in my eyes.  It would otherwise be a rather sad tale of hatred,  or persecution or something,  except for one small problem.

See,  the “perp”, if I were to be so bold as to use some “cop jargon”,  is one Samuel Mullet.

Heeheee!  I just laughed again!   Oh Lordy.

 

Yes kids.  This guy named Mullet,  (say it aloud a few times for effect  Mullet Mullet Mullet Mullet…) was convicted of cutting off somebody’s hair. And beards.  Well,  I don’t think the women had beards.  Maybe a bit of stubble? Well, it was he and his followers.  Whatever.  Who cares about the details?   I couldn’t get past “Mullet”!

This is too good to make up, even for my imagination.  Believe me, it’s out there on the net.  Not that I totally believe everything on the net,  but again, it doesn’t matter! 

Thou needst not believeth.  Oops, don’t read that aloud,  unless you’re really dry of mouth.

 

 

 

So just now I did a little looking around,  trolling for images, you know,  in case you were born yesterday and don’t know how the Amish dress or something,  and I found this:

 

Hold on a sec!  Is that dude smoking?   I didn’t think they smoked?  Geez,  I don’t smoke,  and I’m nowhere close to being Amish.   Trust me.  And really, even if they start drinking beer, I still ain’t joinin’ up.   Just so you know.

I had a beard once upon a time.  It gets itchy in the summer.  I used to use “Resdan”.  It helped.  No more beards for me,  thanks.

 

So now apparently,  if you do a Google search for “mullet”, (Mullet Mullet Mullet Mullet)   you might get a story about some Amish “perps” who went around cutting people’s hair off,  or….you could end up with something like this:

*shudder*

 

or worse,  this:

 

Gah!

Whatever you come up with, I’d wager that your first thought would be,  “What were you thinking?”  

That’s my best guess.

 

 

*ahem*

 

Moving on.

This sign caught my attention this morning.  There’s something about that last line that doesn’t sit well.  I do so wish the Austrians would either stick with German,  or hire some actual English speaking people to check over their stuff.  I’m no marketing guru,  so I’m not exactly tooled up to know what to put there at the bottom to entice people to come into the store,  but somehow “successful”  and “shopping”  don’t seem to work together.    I didn’t go in,  so I guess my shopping was “successful”?

Even then, if I can get the hell out of a store without buying anything more than what I intended on getting,  that’s my version of “successful shopping”.  I’d also like to think of it as “commando”,  but that can be confused with something else entirely.   We’ll just say,  I try to be a very “task oriented” shopper, all the while keeping my clothes on.  

So maybe they could have said, “Please come in and browse”?   I think that would work.  Where do I sign up?

 

By now you’ve no doubt figured out,  after slogging through the previous (what is it now?) 588 words (don’t you love Blogger?)  that there’s not really too danged much going on today.

It’s a fairly normal Friday.  Of course,  we’re expecting more guests to arrive on Tuesday morning,  so I’ll be swabbing the decks,  painting the hull and polishing the bright work between now and then.  And it goes without saying that I strip our bed on a Friday and get that sorted out.   And that’s about it.

Hopefully the weather holds out for our guests,  as the fall can be a little iffy here in Wienerland.   We’ve had a bit of rain over the last few days and now it’s cleared up.  It’s not like they’re having to hang out in a hotel for the whole time,  as we have plenty of extra warm clothes to loan out if need be,  not to mention about a dozen umbrellas.  Don’t ask.  I swear they breed somehow.

 

Travelling Companion is still in the midst of “Profit Plan”,  so I have no clue how late she’ll be again tonight.  She arrived without any sort of parking garage issues last night,  so the magic box must have been fixed. 

 

Enjoy your weekend,  wherever you may find yourself.

Keep it between the ditches.

 

Thanks for stopping ‘round.

 

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