Thursday, December 19, 2013

Now this is what I’m talking about.

With the road conditions having the potential for being somewhat less than ideal,  the subject of driving and idiot drivers is one that is hard to stay away from. 

The news folks will sometimes feature a video and shove it out there as an example of their version of “news gathering”, and that’s the only way I would have stumbled across this one.

So here is a prime example of well,  someone who is perhaps not the brightest bulb.

What the caption should say is, “Woman does absolutely nothing to avoid flipping her car.”

 

 

Watch what she does at about 14 seconds in.   Actually,  it’s more like what she’s NOT doing at about 14 seconds in.  

No clue. 

For those of you who perhaps don’t have the bandwidth to watch the video,  just try to imagine someone at the wheel who is quite likely a good candidate for "Canada's Worst Driver",  although she looks like she’s perhaps in Europe somewhere.  Or at least certainly not North America judging by the lack of shoulders on that road.

Nobody trained her to turn into the skid.  She just hangs on for dear life.  Yikes.

I was reminded the other day by Daughter Number Two that we did indeed go out after the first snow fall back in the day when she first got her licence to have a go at “Bob’s skid school”.    We found ourselves a nice empty shopping plaza and had at it. 

You have to know what a vehicle will do if you lose traction.  Now,  maybe I created a monster,  because she loves driving in the snow.  Not to the point of being goofy or anything,  but with enough confidence to know how to handle her car in all situations.   I somehow think they don’t bother teaching it in Driving School?  I don’t seem to recall any mention of “steering into the skid” when I took “Young Drivers of Canada”.   Admittedly, that was eons ago,  so I probably forgot.  

The parts that I do remember though have to do with being the first one at the wheel when we started the in car sessions.  There were two other students and me.  (“me” = indirect pronoun)

I was the only one who had driven up to that point,  and although I had just turned 16, I had been driving for a couple years.   Not on the roads all that much,  and only when necessary.  (Shhh,  don’t tell!)

There’s a story there about being too young to drink and therefore having to drive a brother (no,  not “a Brothah”) from Keswick back to King City at about 3:00 a.m.   I still remember my Dad asking the next day, “So, who drove home?”  at which point I raised my hand. 

He just laughed.   

Hey,  it was 3:00 a.m., country roads,  nobody around.

(and I wanted to go home!)

Now,  I don’t know if you’ve ever been in a vehicle with someone who has never been at the wheel,  but it can be a,  how shall I put this?  “unique experience”?   One of the students couldn’t grasp the concept that you had to let go of the steering wheel after rounding a corner. 

Man of man,  I was sure glad the instructor had that extra brake pedal on his side!  And that I didn’t have to go to the bathroom.   Well,  I was a young snot, so I’m sure I had much better bladder control.   Let’s leave that alone.

I understand nowadays you don’t go out with extra bodies in the car for the in car sessions.  Probably just as well.  It didn’t seem to bother me to have a couple extra bodies in the back seat.  And I only was taking the driving course to get a lower insurance rate. 

To this day I’d love to have a sticker for the back of the car that reads,  “If you’re tailgating close enough to read this, I probably pay less for insurance than you do!”

And then secretly,  I’d like it to say,  “Now f**k off!”

Hate tailgaters.

 

So lemme see.  What’s new and exciting for today?   There’s been some more cleaning up downstairs for the company that’s coming.   That would my job of course.

Oh,  and by the way,  we do have a couple of those blow up beds,  but that day bed is going to stay there for a time,  so it’s no hardship to get it unwrapped and set up.

 

And I did bring in the tree and set it up.  

We saw this neat-o Christmas tree stand a couple years ago in Austria and I finally was able to try it out today.  I think you can get them over here now,  but I haven’t really looked.

There’s no bending over!  You just stick the butt of the tree in the device and push down on the ratchet to tighten the clamps and Bob’s yer Uncle!

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I spent a whopping two bucks for the Christmassy table cloth arrangement to put underneath.  I like to have something under the tree that’s half ways leak proof,  even though I have no intention of splashing water all over the place.  Never good for the hardwood.

 

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This was a twenty dollar tree from the grocery store down the street. 

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Just wait long enough and the branches fall down.  

And that’s it,  I’m done!

 

What?  I said I’d “put up the tree”.  No mention of decorating the stupid thing. 

Ain’t my deal man.

Hey,  just because I make the “putting up” part easier, that doesn’t mean I want to jump right in there and start decorating.  Gah!

 

 

Five more shopping days. 

Better yet,  seven more days and we’re outta here!  Already got me some new swimming trunks. I think that’s about all I’ll be taking.

 

Keep them sticks on the ice.

 

Thanks for stopping ‘round.

 

All grammar mistakes are intentional,  but you know that.

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10 comments:

  1. I'm trying to figure out how she even started to skid. Tap the breaks on black ice around a slight curve? Foot off gas to slow down. I did the lot thing with my kids also. My brother taught me to do donuts in the snow.

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  2. I learned on a stick shift and had a hard time getting the footwork down between the clutch, gas and brake. But that was nearly 60 years ago and now I don't think kids drive anything but automatics. When we started RVing I gave my Honda to our granddaughter... she gave it back a month later... couldn't drive it.

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  3. Pretty scary video. Looks like they were going to fast but hard to tell.
    I like the tree stand.

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  4. I want to know who puts a double video camera in their car? Nothing like giving the sharks, er, laywers more ammunition to hang you with in a lawsuit... :cO

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  5. Yep, nothing I hate more in the driving world than tailgaters. How can soooooo many drivers be soooooo stupid!!

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  6. With the double video that looked like a staged roll over.
    You're right about kids not being taught to steer into the skid. The year my kid sister was learning to drive the first s@#wfall I took her to a mall and showed her how to get out of skids that I created. It took two hours to pry her hands from the dashboard but she's never had any accidents that were her fault.

    Enjoy the warm weather and Be Safe!

    It's about time.

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  7. Mike worked really hard trying to steer into our skid the other night--just didn't work, we still went in the ditch--for a second or two I thought he was going to straighten us out but nope, over we went. And Michael too hates tailgaters!

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  8. It can be tricky but I did a lot of practice in all my vehicles except the motorhome, don't think I want to play it on ice and snow, could be costly.

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  9. I find putting on the flashing emergency lights for tailgaters works well for a few seconds anyway.

    Sure glad that Christmas Tree decided to branch out so to speak. I like the stand idea - Bob's your uncle alright.

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  10. Sounds like you were a great teacher to your kids! Love the tree. Sure miss that fresh pine smell, don't get that down here at all.

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Well, I've been getting too many spam comments showing up. Just a drag, so we'll go another route and hope that helps. So, we won't be hearing anything more from Mr. Nony Moose.
I guess I'll just have to do without that Gucci purse.